The evidence is everywhere. Half as many divorces each year as marriages, high-profile couples breaking up, cohabitation on the rise. Judging from the media coverage, you would think that marriage is an institution on its deathbed.
But results of a new national poll appearing in last week's Parade Magazine tells quite a different story. In their special commissioned report, "The Truth About American Marriage," Parade notes that 7 of 8 couples in the U.S. were happy or reasonably content in their marriage. Only seven percent claimed to be in a marriage that was unhappy or hostile. And three fourths claim to have reasonably fulfilling sex lives, even though more than 30 percent reported being physically intimate less than once a month.
Not all of the results were rosy, though. One in nine women and one in five men had been unfaithful to their marriage partner. And 30 percent of men and half again as many women think about leaving their spouse.
Here are some highlights of the survey:
Marital Permanence:
- More than one third have been married more than once
- More than one third have been married more than 20 years
- Nearly three fourths attributed companionship or deep love for their marriage lasting, and more than 60 percent mentioned living up to a commitment
Relationships:
- Well over half were satisfied with their level of communication.
- Finances and chores were the most likely points of disagreement, followed by sex
Sex:
- Three-forths of both men and women reported satisfaction with their sex lives
- Six in 10 men were satisfied with the frequency of sex; For women it was 50/50.
- Nearly half of men said they didn't have sex more often because their wife wasn't interested; One third of women said they were too tired
Affairs:
- More than two-thirds of those who have never had an affair cite commitment to their mate as the main reason
- Of men who had affairs, six in 10 had been with more than one partner; 55% of women had limited their infidelity to just one person
- More than half said they would confront their spouse and try and save the marriage if they found out they had been unfaithful. About 30 percent of men and 40 percent of women would leave immediately or consider divorce
Satisfaction:
- 57 percent said they were happy with their marriage, and another 30 percent were satisfied
- 5 in 9 said they would definitely marry their spouse again; another 28 percent of men and nearly a fourth of the women said they probably would
- More than 8 in 10 said they married for love; 40 percent also said it was because the time was right
