By Scott Williams
What does it take to have the perfect marriage? Editors at the British wedding planning website, confetti.co.uk, seem to have it worked out to a science. Marriage by the numbers, if you will.
1 "I love you" a day
2 common hobbies, 2 romantic meals and 2 nights a month out separately with friends
3 cuddles a day, 3 phone calls, text messages or emails a day, and 3 times a week having sex
4 kisses a day
The poll of 3,000 married adults also found other common grounds for a long-lasting marriage:
- He should be 31
- She should be 29
- The first child will arrive in about 2 years
I'm wondering how Ellie and I have been very happily married nearly 24 years so far, since we meet only 3 or 4 of the 11 criteria above.
Actually, while we'd dispute the numbers, we're generally agreed that this website is on the right track about a few things… and missed the track on others. Here's some of the things we've found to be important in keeping our marriage strong, and how often we do them:
- Seeking the best for each other rather than looking out for self (no limit)
- Taking the time to communicate our love and commitment to each other (no limit)
- Sharing the same core values, particularly a commitment to Christ (no limit)
- Making romance and intimacy a priority (no limit)
- Learning to disagree and work out differences without attacking each other (no limit)
If you want a good article on building a strong marriage from someone who's been married since 1972 and been teaching about marriage since 1976 consider The Foundation of a "Oneness Marriage".
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