It comes around every third Sunday in June. A day is set aside to honor our earthly fathers and the contributions they have made to our lives. It's a day where we bring ourselves to say the deep, heartfelt things that we often think but rarely utter: appreciation for the sacrifices, strength, and guidance dad has provided.
For many, though, Father's Day is painful. They have grown up in a home where dad was abusive or distant, if he was even there. How do you bring yourself to honor one who seems so dishonorable?
One common choice is to hold on to bitterness. William Ireland was only six when his father, Ken, left the family for another woman. Young William spent his childhood years longing for his father, who had completely disappeared from the scene. A few years before his father's death, William found him and re-established contact. Then, despite the new relationship, the father left the entire estate to the other woman and her son.
Now, after years of legal wrangling, William Ireland has his father's ashes (after all, he paid for the funeral). The other woman and her son wanted to turn the ashes into a diamond. Instead, William is repaying his father by selling the ashes to the highest bidder on Ebay.
Another choice is to seek reconciliation. Liberty Mutual's Responsibility Project features several short films about acting responsibly in life. One particular video caught my eye (and left a tear in it as well). A young mother with a past similar to William's is forced to come to terms with the years of hurt and bitterness caused by her father's abandonment of the family. It's well worth the watch. Enjoy.
Is it possible to honor a parent who has betrayed you? Yes, but it requires forgiveness that's above your ability to extend. It requires you to know the perfect Heavenly Father, who, even when we have shown hostility to him, reaches out to us.
But God demonstrated His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. - Romans 5:8
FamilyLife has resources to help you to honor your father or mother, including a free download to help you craft a personal tribute. For those who have been blessed with good parents, writing a tribute is a way to show the overwhelming gratitude you feel but don't always show. For those who have been betrayed, writing a tribute can be an opportunity to work through hurt and bitterness and to reach out, not in anger, but with the love of the Heavenly Father.
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